Basically, monsters have taken the Princess Min-Min captive and have stolen the 10 treasures of the "nameless" (another Wikipedia article called it the seemingly racist name of "Chinaland") land that these people live in (which looks like a giant game of Majongg or "Shanghai" as some games call it). Basically, you just have to beat up wave after wave of baddies on each level to progress.

So I start playing this game and I'm standing in what looks like a somewhat demented Majongg playfield, like a Gonzo imagination session from Muppet Babies or something, and all these guys who look like Master Higgins family if they were villians in a bond flick just start wandering out from the edges of the screen and start punching and hitting my character...so I do what I always do in these situations....walk around and randomly bash buttons causing myself to somehow win the level despite having the beat-em'-up "skillz" of a rabid chimp on horse tranquilizers! Meanwhile, my opponents look like a cross between a Hare Krishna lovechild of Oddjob from Goldfinger and Wimpy from the Popeye cartoons! I mean seriously, what the hell is going on here? Is this a Mafioso game of Majongg where someone was caught wheedling on the tiles and stealing the margarine (not-so-obvious Frank Zappa reference)? I don't think this is a cause that warrants the spawning of the Crazy 88 from Kill Bill!!